So Brendan, how's that unemployment schtick treating you?
Well, let's put it this way. I'm sitting at home right now watching Judge Mathis and blogging. Television has taught me many things. For example, I've learned that Sharon Osborne looks like Lady Elaine Fairchild and that Paris Hilton looks like Mr. Peanut (best when choosing the "classic tap" option). I've also learned about boohbah. Don't EVER let your kid watch this show. Adults however may wish to partake in some recreational pharmaceuticals, and indulge-- I watch a half-hour of Boohbah in the morning and it's like I did a half dozen bong hits followed by a dose of LSD.
Happy hour still starts every day around 5:30, except I don't go to bars anymore. I drink at home for a third of the price! I've always believed that drinking at home and buying by the case was cheaper, but stubbornly, I've always gone to bars. And for what, other than to talk to drunk people? I'm spoken for, I can't be prowling from dames. Now that penury has driven me into the house, I find that when i do go to bars, I'm offended by the prices as well as the people. I don't miss it: by the time I'm done with cooking dinner and watching back-to-back-episodes of The Simpsons, I've had three beers. No way do i want to do anything at that point, other than get ready for bed. I apply for jobs over the internet, so there's no need to leave the premises unless I really need to, like if I have to grocery shop. If I need sun, I sit on the back porch and drink my coffee there. I clean my house everyday, vacuuming, sweeping, washing windows, clearing the yard. I bench press every other day. I save tons by cooking at home, and I eat better too. Lots of beans and rice. Surprisingly, lots of Indian food. Once you've bought the spices (heavy on the cumin, coriander, and trumeric) the only expensive ingredient is ghee. Other than that you're buying stuff like frozen spinach or kale (89 cents for a 10-ounce package), potatoes, canned tomatoes, fresh ginger, and chili peppers. I can make a week's worth of food for under $20.00 usually.
On the other hand, the poverty sucks. It really sucks. The last time I collected unemployment benefits was back in 2001; about a year later, the University of Pennsylvania challenged my claim, and unfortunately won the mediation session. What it boils down to is that while I was under no obligation to pay back the money I was awarded, if I didn't repay, any benefits I was entitled to in the next 3 years would be garnished by one third until the Department of Labor and Industry had recouped its losses. The result? I make about $218 a week, instead of the $328 I should be getting. The poverty makes it impossible for me to juggle all the bands, parenthood, and commuting to Canada. Thus, after next week I am either quitting or going on extended hiatus from Unclefucker until I have some real income coming in. Unfortunate, but what canya do? Once Melissa and ol' Sammy are living down here, my time is going to be freed up somewhat, but for now, everything's tight.
Oooh, look at the time: it's Beer-thirty, so you'll pardon me as I down some suds. they're Sierra Nevadas. I spent too much money on them last night: I got a little gift from God yesterday, when I found out that Penn still had a paycheck waiting for me. I got out too late to hit the distributor and bought a 6-pack at the bar. If you're familiar with Pennsie's liquor laws, you know I took a hit on that sixer.
Lately I've been buying cases of Red Bell's Philadelphia Lager. They're a lot better than Yuengling lager in terms of taste and potency (for soem reason i was able to drink like 10 yuenglings a few days ago and it was like I hadn't drank a drop; go figure). For the quality it's really cheap, which leads me to believe that the company may have gone out of business and they[re getting rid of the stock at bargain prices. Too bad, because that's some good beer.
ooh, look at the time again. Time to watch the Simpsons...
Well, let's put it this way. I'm sitting at home right now watching Judge Mathis and blogging. Television has taught me many things. For example, I've learned that Sharon Osborne looks like Lady Elaine Fairchild and that Paris Hilton looks like Mr. Peanut (best when choosing the "classic tap" option). I've also learned about boohbah. Don't EVER let your kid watch this show. Adults however may wish to partake in some recreational pharmaceuticals, and indulge-- I watch a half-hour of Boohbah in the morning and it's like I did a half dozen bong hits followed by a dose of LSD.
Happy hour still starts every day around 5:30, except I don't go to bars anymore. I drink at home for a third of the price! I've always believed that drinking at home and buying by the case was cheaper, but stubbornly, I've always gone to bars. And for what, other than to talk to drunk people? I'm spoken for, I can't be prowling from dames. Now that penury has driven me into the house, I find that when i do go to bars, I'm offended by the prices as well as the people. I don't miss it: by the time I'm done with cooking dinner and watching back-to-back-episodes of The Simpsons, I've had three beers. No way do i want to do anything at that point, other than get ready for bed. I apply for jobs over the internet, so there's no need to leave the premises unless I really need to, like if I have to grocery shop. If I need sun, I sit on the back porch and drink my coffee there. I clean my house everyday, vacuuming, sweeping, washing windows, clearing the yard. I bench press every other day. I save tons by cooking at home, and I eat better too. Lots of beans and rice. Surprisingly, lots of Indian food. Once you've bought the spices (heavy on the cumin, coriander, and trumeric) the only expensive ingredient is ghee. Other than that you're buying stuff like frozen spinach or kale (89 cents for a 10-ounce package), potatoes, canned tomatoes, fresh ginger, and chili peppers. I can make a week's worth of food for under $20.00 usually.
On the other hand, the poverty sucks. It really sucks. The last time I collected unemployment benefits was back in 2001; about a year later, the University of Pennsylvania challenged my claim, and unfortunately won the mediation session. What it boils down to is that while I was under no obligation to pay back the money I was awarded, if I didn't repay, any benefits I was entitled to in the next 3 years would be garnished by one third until the Department of Labor and Industry had recouped its losses. The result? I make about $218 a week, instead of the $328 I should be getting. The poverty makes it impossible for me to juggle all the bands, parenthood, and commuting to Canada. Thus, after next week I am either quitting or going on extended hiatus from Unclefucker until I have some real income coming in. Unfortunate, but what canya do? Once Melissa and ol' Sammy are living down here, my time is going to be freed up somewhat, but for now, everything's tight.
Oooh, look at the time: it's Beer-thirty, so you'll pardon me as I down some suds. they're Sierra Nevadas. I spent too much money on them last night: I got a little gift from God yesterday, when I found out that Penn still had a paycheck waiting for me. I got out too late to hit the distributor and bought a 6-pack at the bar. If you're familiar with Pennsie's liquor laws, you know I took a hit on that sixer.
Lately I've been buying cases of Red Bell's Philadelphia Lager. They're a lot better than Yuengling lager in terms of taste and potency (for soem reason i was able to drink like 10 yuenglings a few days ago and it was like I hadn't drank a drop; go figure). For the quality it's really cheap, which leads me to believe that the company may have gone out of business and they[re getting rid of the stock at bargain prices. Too bad, because that's some good beer.
ooh, look at the time again. Time to watch the Simpsons...
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