Monday, July 11, 2005

I'm taking a quick break from a much longer piece I'm working on, but I just want to say, I don't know what to think about Hell's Kitchen the Fox series.

Gordon Ramsay is a fucking ham, going out of his way to be the biggest composite of every dickhead cook I have ever worked for, from Genevieve to Deedy to Joey Baggadonuts to the Pizza Pal.

On the one hand, I have total sympathy for this cast of losers, who've never been in a kitchen.
On the other hand I can see why Ramsay would get pissed off with this cast of losers: I'm a really good guy in the kitchen, reliable and fun, and I would kill these people.
I would also kill Ramsay. One thing you learn pretty quick in a kitchen is to keep your rage to yourself. Never provoke anyone who has easy access to a large, sharp knife.
I do not know who I am rooting for, if anyone. Someone needs to throw them all in the oven, like Gretel did to the witch.


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